The completely unfiltered diary of a 23-year-old (week 44)

Amberblazexx
5 min readMay 5, 2021

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Damn, the week flew by again and I haven’t written anything.

Let me try to remember what happened without referring to my calendar.

I just went to the office for the first time in two weeks. Last week, the office was closed because of a COVID-19 case in the building. Restrictions are ramping up again. I hope things don’t get too bad, and that this early intervention is early enough.

Oh yea. Hung out with Lauren to celebrate her freedom. She’s finally done with school!! Freaking awesome. We went to a Korean place and it must’ve been authentic because the place was filled with Koreans. This nice Korean mom-and-daughter pair was sitting at the table next to us, and when our food arrived, the mom was nice enough to tell us, “Hey, hope you don’t mind me saying, but this is how we usually eat this dish in Korea,” and she showed us how they move the rice from the hot stone bowl into an aluminum bowl to let it cool so it isn’t burning hot when you eat it. And how you can pour water/soup into the stone rice bowl to soak up the rice that gets stuck to the bottom of the bowl. I was surprised, because I just thought us Asians usually don’t talk to strangers. But that was really cool.

Plus, I was really proud of myself for eating “spicy” Korean soup. It was a first.

I felt bad though, because Lauren and I ended up walking around for like two hours, and we were both exhausted. LOL. Kinda feel like she didn’t have as much fun as she should have, given that it was her friggin graduation celebration. Ok, not quite graduation yet, but she’s finally done with school.

The next day, we had a family trip to the aquarium. It was pretty nice, though hella crowded. At first they wouldn’t let us in because we’d stupidly booked tickets for the wrong date, but thankfully, when we went to the ticketing counter, they helped us exchange the tickets.

We saw some adorable jellyfishies, though they’re probably only adorable when they’re not stinging you.

Then we got home and almost immediately, Mom and Dad started arguing. It was exhausting.

It’s not that bad — no real domestic violence or anything, but still. We stayed up trying to figure shit out. Thank god my brother is here. I’m terrified of what will happen when he leaves. Dad has a huge but fragile ego.

Then again, we all have egos. Oh well.

The next morning, Gia and I went climbing. It was good. Halfway through, some middle-aged American (?) guy scolded me for something I thought was his fault (eventually I decided it wasn’t either of our faults. We’d had a miscommunication. He’d thought I was an asshole, and I’d thought he was an asshole, but we had just misunderstood each other.) It really annoyed me at first, though I’m glad I hadn’t reflexively apologized to him like what the meek and non-confrontational Asian in me wanted to, but eventually I just thought something he said was really funny. He’d said, “You and your colleague over there…” Yep. Colleague. Does he not know the word for friend?

Maybe he didn’t want to assume we were friends, in case we were sisters/lesbian partners even. Alright. Benefit of the doubt awarded.

Colleagues though. Really?

Sounded like the corporate stick-up-his-ass type. But maybe he was just having a bad day. Hell, he was doing a great job of climbing with his teenage son. So, good on him.

Plus, his son actually came up to encourage me briefly on one of the climbs after that (maybe he felt bad), and that was honestly really cute.

Oh and, Gia dyed her hair. On her own. I was a bit sad that she hadn’t asked me for help. Wow I’m selfish. But yeah, it wasn’t the best dye job and she probably would’ve benefited from having a friend help.

Wow, I’m overestimating my own abilities.

We also tried to play basketball but got intimidated when we realized there were 8 giant guys playing on the court. Nope.

Kinda wish I had the balls to just go in anyway and miss all my shots. (The guys were on one end; the other end was open.)

Monday was a holiday and Shelly and I hung out to celebrate her birthday. We were supposed to exercise but the gym was full, so we ended up eating way too much in the time we had. It was excessive piggery. Complete opposite of what we’d intended to do.

It seems “piggery” is actually a word. Medium hasn’t underlined it with autocorrect.

I also listened to a Duolingo Spanish podcast, and actually managed to understand it a fair bit. That was pretty exciting, since I remember giving up on those a few months back, because the language was too advanced for me.

The rest of the week was work, I guess.

Oh, and a random order on my side gig. Made about a hundred bucks (USD), and it was actually a nice read.

Also ran for the first time in maybe 1–2 weeks. The trick really is to put on your shoes and get out of the house before you have time to or allow yourself to think. Once you think about it, it’s practically impossible to convince yourself to voluntarily go through torture. Clearly, I’m not the runner type. I regretted my life choices towards the end of the run, as I always do.

It does get marginally better with consistent practice though.

And yeah, I think that’s it for the past week.

Damn, I actually remembered. I guess it was a week with a lot of outings with friends (and family), which makes it easier to recall since these are distinct, planned events.

Oh and, I met a new person in office today. A friend of another ex-intern I knew from before. She seems kind of fake (not really in a bad way), though it could be because I associated her with the ex-intern, who was also kind of fake. Maybe my expectations are too high. I just got the feeling that they wouldn’t talk to me if I wasn’t beneficial to them in some way at work. Maybe that’s just how corporate work relationships are like.

Alright, they seem like okay people though. I’m just gonna be more open minded and give them a chance. Plus, no harm building bridges. I guess I’m slowly becoming a corporate faker too.

xo,

Amber

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