The completely unfiltered diary of a 23-year-old girl (week 5)
Guess who asked for more work from her boss. Such initiative.
Kinda regretting it too. Like maybe a 6/10 regret so it’s not that bad, I guess.
Went to office for the first time since the first day and met many of my colleagues for the first time. It was good to meet them. Because when you talk to them over text messages or emails, it can feel very professional and you lose a lot of body language cues. I saw somewhere that millennials like to use exclamation marks to show enthusiasm, while boomers find them very aggressive. Meanwhile, boomers use ellipses (these things “…”) and periods without thinking much about it, while millennials find these (especially preiods) kinda aggressive. and I really do think it’s true lol. You really do lose tone of voice over text. In person though, these people really seem like good, hardworking, well-intentioned people. Like they’re really there working in the government to contribute to society. I’m so glad we have people like them to serve the general population.
But I’m also starting to get the feeling that I might not be the most suited to this. Well, not that I’ve done much, but it seems like a very broad, high-level type of job, and I think I might need something that allows for narrower focus and more depth. This is probably my engineering background manifesting.
Enough about work.
A friend that’s been really down for the past couple months (she completely isolated since the start of COVID-19) asked me out this weekend. Which makes me kinda happy! Too tired from doing nothing to really feel energetic enough to hang out right now, but I’m pretty sure by the time the weekend comes around, it’ll be fine. I’m so glad she’s reaching out though. I’ve been trying to keep in contact with her and check in on her every now and then, but given I’m also not in the best of states, I kinda got tired of checking up on her all the time.
And at some point I don’t wanna always be the person reaching out, y’know. I’ve gotta protect myself too.
But yeah, she’s a friend who’s been around for like five years. And we know we’ve got each other’s back. Which, I guess, is good enough.
Anyway, about the past week. It was a long weekend, which was pretty awesome and actually felt long. Which meant that when Monday came, it was all the more painful. But it started off really good. Went climbing, and honestly, this is something I keep having to remind myself of, but a climbing session always feels good. This has been true every single time, even when I was feeling like shit and had to drag myself out to go climb. So yeah, time to remind myself of that again!
Got my official college degree too. Which honestly didn’t really give me any feelings, but I know my parents were definitely really excited about it. Maybe it’s because there was no graduation ceremony and no picture taking and all that made it feel less like an achievement. Or maybe it’s just a general meh-ness on top of the COVID crappiness that has just sucked the joy out of stuff.
Ok no. This is not gonna be another depressing post LOL.
…
Oh my goodness. I have no idea what to write about. Yikes. Clearly gotta start doing something with my life LOL.
Well when I went to office, I had to wear some office clothes for the first time in months, and realized that I couldn’t fit into this pair of high-waisted pants I’d bought just a year ago. Gosh, COVID sloth life and general blobbiness has truly taken its toll. Definitely gotta watch that fitness level. But anyway, I been wearing the same top every time I’ve met my boss — hope he hasn’t noticed. It’s my only non-dark blue, non-basic plain white office shirt top that I have, and unfortunately since the only other pair of pants that I have and can thankfully fit into are dark blue, it’s the only top I’ve been wearing. LOL. Maybe the real issue is the number of dark blue tops I have. Or maybe I just need some black pants that I can wear with blue tops. Fashion has never been a strong suit of mine.
I did finally finish up that pair of high-waisted pants-turned-shorts project I’d been working on for forever though. Haven’t worn it out yet, but I think it looks pretty good (though I still honestly think high-waisted shorts kinda make your ass look flat. Or maybe I just have a flat ass. It’s your ass, not the pants. :’) Also high waisted stuff kinda reminds me of pampers but I’m probably the only one who thinks that). And yeah, it’ll be a huge upgrade from the stuff I usually wear. Literally almost all the friends I’ve had, guys included, have at some point comments on how my wardrobe consists solely of t-shirts and shorts. And when even guys who are not romantically interested in you start noticing your outfits, you know something is up.
Who cares though, I love that combo and I know I look good in it ;)
#confidencebitches
Ok enough of this extremely self-focused and conceited talk lol. It’s the middle of the week! As usual I’m struggling to figure out the meaning of life and all, and why I’m working and blahblah, is there any point to all this. Haven’t figured it out yet, but talking about clothes has actually made me a little happier. So thanks for listening :)
Here’s to a good second half of the work week and then a great weekend!
xo,
Amber
